Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
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