i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Randomize
