Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
