If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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