You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize