I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
