i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
