So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
