oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
