Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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