She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
