We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize