Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
