i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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