He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
