so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.