My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
