I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
i black out too much to be "responsible"
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
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