i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
should my penis look like a turkey
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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