you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
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We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
third nipple confirmed
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
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