Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Randomize
