if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Houston, we have a squirter
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize