I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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