Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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