i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
