Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Randomize
