youre lurking in front of me
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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