he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize