dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
