I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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