just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
