He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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