I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
someone get that fucking seahorse.
where am i from again
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize
