I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
