My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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