Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Randomize
