I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
