I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize