dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
