Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
