I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
