i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
