first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Randomize