its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
she looked like the before picture.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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