I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
