I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Randomize
