If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
