yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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