My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
do herpes really smell.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Randomize
