I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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