if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
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