carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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